by Louise
(South korea)
Original Text: Scholarship Admission Letter
Although being the youngest in class I was counted among the intellects of the class. It has always been my motive that you can achieve your goal and ambitions if you believe in yourself and strive hard for it.
When I was in primary school I’ve always been the person to take the first position. During Speech and Prize Giving Days, I received prizes for being the overall best in class. I have also been the class president and representative during primary school, teachers saw my ability to lead people and correct them.
In middle school, I was ranked second with during a joint test (mathematics) with our seniors. However, the person ranked first was a senior.
I took part in various clubs such as the literature club, French club and Art club. I am also the best in art since I am artistic. I help the art teacher design and make and give him ideas. I was also part of the school’s choir and choreography club. We sang for various occasions such as wedding s, funerals, or when invited by other schools.
At the last trimester of seventh grade, I received a certificate for being the best in science on Awards Night. In my final school year, I participated in the BECE exams (Basic Education Certificate Exams). My results were good.
My dream or should I say goal in life is to help others in need and make them believe there’s something meaningful in their life. This I believe will also spread God’s gospel to those who are in pain and gave up hope.
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Revised Text:
Although I was the youngest, I was counted among the intellects of my class. It has always been my belief that you can achieve your goals and ambitions if you believe in yourself and strive hard for them.
When I was in primary school I was always the person to take the first position. During Speech and Prize Giving Days, I received prizes for being the overall best in class. I was also the class president and a representative during primary school. Teachers saw my ability to lead people and correct them.
In middle school, I was ranked second in a joint test (mathematics) with our seniors. The person ranked first was a senior.
I took part in various clubs such as the literature, French and Art clubs. I was also the best in art since I am artistic. I helped the art teacher design and make projects and gave him ideas. I was also part of the school’s choir and the choreography club. We sang for various occasions such as weddings and funerals, or when invited by other schools.
In the last trimester of seventh grade, I received a certificate for being the best in science on Awards Night. In my final school year, I participated in the BECE exams (Basic Education Certificate Exams) and my results were good.
My dream, or should I say goal, in life is to help others in need and make them believe there’s something meaningful in their life. This I believe will also spread God’s gospel to those who are in pain and who have given up hope.
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